Today started off really positive. I had a fantastic nights sleep and couldn't believe it when I woke up actually feeling refreshed for once. Months of sleeping sitting up surrounded by pillows and unable to sleep on my side has really taken its toll so I was thrilled that I managed to sleep well!
BUT THEN..... I went to get dressed and discovered that more growth has occurred and that my once well fitting bra is now next to useless. To be honest I had an idea this would be the case as I have had such heaviness in my chest as well as increased burning pains and itching these past few days but it is still a shock when you have to accept it has happened. The worst thing is I need a bra - I can't get one as there isn't any company that specialises in bras big enough for my size so I have shed quite a few tears today - more in frustration than anything else. I have to wear a bra all the time as I can't bear the weight suctioning down on the rest of my body so now am clueless as to how I am going to get round this problem. I guess I will just have to shove them into the ill-fitting bra - something is better than nothing! Seriously though, that is the problem with this condition, I have one moment where I think yay today is gonna be good - I had a great sleep - then it is all totally undone in a matter of minutes. The negatives always seem to be hot on the heels of any positives that's for sure.
Also I used to get some comfort with my v pillow lodged underneath my chest like a support but even that isn't helping as they are just so heavy. It feels like they are trying to push their way into my stomach and it's agony!
So now I have spent the day feeling really down - looking more like a freak than ever and I feel so swollen and fat its untrue! I just wish I could look like any other normal pregnant woman showing off her baby bump with pride instead of trying to hide myself in men's xl tops and failing to look anything like a blooming mum to be but rather more like the freak I feel I am. When will this nightmare end???
Today is so not good but I am hoping tomorrow may be a bit better??
No comments:
Post a Comment